giving birth is essentially just like pooping except out a different hole
are your poops covered in blood and start screaming and crying
only after i eat mexican food
Getting a Job in a Nutshell
(Source: getalittlebitchier, via redforeman)
i was sitting in the bathroom today when like 5 girls walked in and i stopped pooping right away cause i didn’t want them to hear me but then i thought why is taking a shit so bastardized today like why cant i poop in peace in the privacy of my own stall without caring if people listen to the flop flop plop plop sploosh sploosh like damn just sing along to the ploop blop and enjoy symphony no. 9 a la my asshole
(Source: angrydance, via tumboner)
i wish i had a little toilet and sink in the corner of my room so i wouldnt have to walk all the way to the bathroom
That’s a prison cell
In prison your food gets cooked for you as well.
I’m beginning to think murdering people I don’t like wouldn’t be such a bad thing.
you do realize that there’s probably police officers on here, right?
oh no what are they going to do send me to prison?
Outtake of Matt/Karen. They kept having to reshoot it because Matt would kiss back. Ooh girl.
(Source: chelsdamelsp, via tumboner)